VERS: Bűntudat nélküli, félelem nélküli... anyukai boldogság

NO MORE GUILT OR FEAR... HAPPINESS <3 I used to believe that feeling Guilt and Fear

was an inherent part of being a mother....

I remember my friend

calling and asking...

"So how are you liking motherhood?"

And I replied,

Well I am worried about X,

I am looking into Y,

I wish I had done W,

and I am so confused about Z...

And she said,

"I see... But how are you liking motherhood?"

And I had NO ANSWER to give...

I felt NOTHING

but Guilt

and Fear...

This Guilt and Fear

were preventing me from

feeling Positive Emotions

like joy, love, peace, excitement, satisfaction, fulfillment...

They were preventing me

from being the mother

that I wanted to be!

I realized that this Guilt and Fear

were CAUSED by society!

They were NOT an inherent part of motherhood at all!

It WAS possible to be both

a happy mother

and a good mother,

and feel NO Guilt and NO Fear at all!

I freed myself from these emotions...

and you can too! :)

We mothers CAN be emotionally free! <3

To your happy mother life...

Marni Penner

A Kanadai Coach :)

A jó anyukáknak kell érezniük lelkiismeret-furdalást?

DO GOOD MOTHERS AUTOMATICALLY FEEL GUILT? This is a question I started asking myself when I was so crippled by guilt, I couldn't feel anything else... I felt GUILT on the toilet, GUILT in the shower, GUILT on the phone, GUILT while I was cooking, GUILT while I was cleaning, GUILT while doing the laundry, GUILT while I was working, GUILT at the hairdresser's, GUILT at the grocery store... I felt nothing but NON-STOP GUILT all day long... I read that in our society, it is assumed that "good mothers automatically feel guilt"... And so I started wondering... "In order to be a good mother, do we necessarily have to feel guilt?!" Moreover, is all this guilt actually making me a "good mother", or it is doing the opposite? I realized that this guilt was making me emotionally detached. It was making me suffer... It was making me emotionally unavailable to my children, my husband, and my work... Guilt was ruining my life. If I could only free myself from all this guilt, then I could be the mother that I wanted to be: I could start having FUN with my kids... I could truly ENJOY the time I was spending with them... I could ENJOY my "me time"... I could FOCUS on my work... I could be emotionally FREE... And so I set off on my journey to free myself from mother guilt... I identified nine types of mother guilt, and figured out how to free myself from each one of them... Guilt does not make us "good mothers"... It makes us suffering mothers... It makes us emotionally detached mothers... It puts us in an emotional hell that doesn't allow us to properly cope with our lives... It is being FREE from guilt that allows us to be the mothers that we want to be! Let me know if you'd like to help you free yourself from guilt in my 1-on-1 coaching program! Mothers don't have to feel ANY guilt at all! We CAN be emotionally free! <3 To your Happy Mother Life,

Marni Penner

A Kanadai Coach :)

CIKK: Én csak egy kapcsolatot szerettem volna a gyerekeimmel...

ALL I WANTED WAS A RELATIONSHIP WITH MY CHILDREN...

When I was a young mother, my head was full of "barking mental commands" like...

"Enjoy your baby!"

"Love your baby!"

"Attach with your baby!"

"Stimulate your toddler!"

"Play with your toddler!"

Etc. etc, etc....

All these mental commands going around and around in my head actually had the OPPOSITE effect of what I wanted... :(

The mental command of "Enjoy your baby" seemed to cause me to NOT enjoy my baby every time I remembered the command!

The mental command of "Stimulate your toddler" seemed to cause me to NOT stimulate my toddler every time I remembered that command!

These mental commands seemed to have the OPPOSITE effect of what they were supposed to have!

So, instead of ENJOYING motherhood, I felt nothing but non-stop GUILT... caused by these barking mental commands!

.

Then one day, I got tired of feeling so anxious all the time... so I decided to figure out WHAT WAS GOING ON?!

It turns out that our Society was telling me to "do my parenting research", which then filled my head with these BANAL, barking commands!

These commands were so condescending that I ended up rebelling from them subconsciously.

I later learned that this is exactly how Paradoxical Psychology works!

In paradoxical psychology, the psychologist fills the patient's mind with banal commands of what they are ALREADY DOING, so that the patient rebels and changes his behaviour!

This f-ing parenting research had been pushing me AWAY from my children!!!

.

I was going to have no more of that!

So, I temporarily distanced myself from ALL THE PARENTING MESSAGES directed at mothers.

I was going to clear my head from this mental clutter and enter my HEART.

Moreover, I started reading the SOCIOLOGY of our parenting culture, so that I could better understand what was going on from above.

I realized that I needed to become vulnerable with my mother friends and ask REAL MOTHERS for advice... rather than subjecting myself to the banal, barking commands.

I started telling my friends... "I don't know what to do. Can you help me?"

And they did... and it brought us closer together. <3

.

Everything became so simple.

I could now focus on having FUN with my kids, doing what "I' wanted to do, and having a RELATIONSHIP with my kids.

After all... All my heart really wanted was a relationship with my kids.

.

This Heart-Based Approach finally enabled me to become the mother that I wanted to be, and find my happiness in motherhood.

It is hard to follow our hearts in a culture that does everything to prevent us from doing so...

But for me, it was essential because my heart is where my wisdom lies. <3

.

Let me know if you would like to find out more about how I help mothers and fathers overcome their Anxiety, follow their hearts, improve their Relationships, and find more Happiness in parenthood.

To your happiness...

Marni Penner.

A Kanadai Coach :)